Mommy Cracked

Sunday, July 12

Cruel Summer

How does this:

turn into this?

And why does it have to happen so fast? What I wouldn't give to pinch those chubby little cheeks and legs again!

Thursday, July 9

When we receive special product orders at work, it's often my job to call people to let them know that what they ordered has arrived and they can come pick it up. The part I love about this is that some people are so excited to hear that something they've had to wait on is finally in that they act like I'm with Publisher's Clearing House calling to say they're instant millionaires. It's good to feel needed like that.

Then there are those. Those. Those that I must leave a message for on their voicemail. I don't mind talking to a machine, but some people have taken their right to creative telecommunications to epic levels of FAIL. It always starts out with me calling them only to have to listen to a personalized ring tone. Instead of a regular ring, I have to listen to several lines of the popular Christian song of the minute, usually something by Casting Crowns or Third Day, before I get their voicemail. Then the fun really starts.

Yesterday I called a woman's number to be greeted by a nice enough voice telling me to leave a message. She then went into a tyrade about how the only way to become a Chistian is to accept Christ as my Lord and Savior. Ok, I'm down with that. Then she went on and on in the message basically repeating the same thing until I guess she finally ran out of recording time. What should have took at the most 30 seconds to say took over 2 minutes. 2 minutes to leave a message at the tone. I was pretty mad after listening to all of that and not because I didn't agree with what she was saying, but that was 2 minutes of my life I'll never get back.

Some people feel the need to sing their recorded message, which is fine if you can actually sing, which is not the case 9 times out of 10. Then there are some that have their children record their message, which is cute assuming I can understand them. (Say it with me, Class!..."Which is not the case 9 times out of 10.") And my favorite? The message that says, "Hello?" when it answers and you start to say "Hi, this is Mommy Cracked from__________ Bookstore. I was just calling to tell you that..." and then the voice starts cracking up saying "You thought it was me!! You fell for it! Now leave a message and I'll call you back!"

Har. Har. Har.

In conclusion, if I have to call and leave a message for someone I prefer to do just that and not be subjected to annoying performances of what a person thinks is funny or entertaining. Because I'm all about business like that.

What say you?

Wednesday, July 8

Fat! Naked! Mamas!

So if you came to this post looking for fat naked mamas, I'm so sorry. I'm just fresh out of them today.

But seriously? It cracks me up when I check my stats to see exactly how people find my blog and what amazes me are that the majority of people not purposely looking for my blog end up here because they are looking for pictures of fat naked moms. And why might that be? Because of this post, where I did a giveaway for Fat Mama's Knock You Naked Margarita Mix, which is some amazing stuff if you love margaritas, by the way.

I've also noticed lots of visitors looking for pimped out ice cream trucks. Lucky for them I have one right here.

I also saw that someone came to my blog today looking for the best jeans for an upside down butt, and frankly I'm stumped. I know my butt isn't upside down and I'm pretty sure I couldn't tell you what to do for that.

In conclusion, this post has no real purpose. I have so much to blog about but have been trying to put my house back together after our staycation this past week and getting back into the groove of going to work. But the stats today? They just amused me too much to let the opportunity for this post to pass.

Have you ever noticed people coming to your blog by searching for weird things? Do share! I always love a good laugh!

Tuesday, July 7

Multiply.com Review and 50 FREE Prints!

If you're looking for a fantastic way to keep your uploaded photos organized online, share them with friends and family, AND turn those pictures into fantastic keepsake products, then you'll definitely want to check out Multiply.com,

Multiply offers users so many great solutions for all types of media.

Multiply’s Media Locker serves as a member’s central home for media – making it easier than ever to publish photo albums and videos with a few clicks, while offering members a private, secure dashboard to view, organize, store and edit their media.

Fully Integrated Online photo editing tools including red eye and blemish reduction, cropping and resizing, contrast/brightness controls, exposure adjustment and auto leveling – make it easy to edit photos right from a member’s Media Locker, making photo editing possible at any time, from any computer.

With Version 4.0, Multiply will be the first major social network that offers photo editing integrated within its core service.

Multiply’s AutoUploader is more powerful than ever, making it a simple, time-saving solution for automatically uploading media files to the Multiply Media Locker. AutoUploaders save, on average, 90 minutes each week in upload time with the free, quickly installed, no fuss tool. The AutoUploader provides a completely automated back up solution for a member’s most precious photos and videos.

Picasa and Windows Photo Gallery plug-ins will allow members to seamlessly import their desktop media galleries to their online media lockers.

An Expanded Selection of Photo Finishing Options, with additional themes and options for turning favorite photos into physical products, including photo books, calendars, cards and prints, give members the ability to turn their favorite photos into memorable keepsakes

I found the site very easy to navigate and the auto uploader made uploading my pictures a breeze. Even if your pictures are already uploaded on another site like Facebook or Photobucket, they can easily be transferred. I was also highly impressed with all of the photo products they offer, especially the holiday photo card line. You can skin your Multiply page with different themes and they look almost like mini blogs. I was also relieved to see that there is a privacy level you can control to choose who can view your pictures. The site is very family friendly. I'm sold and I know you will be, too!

Multiply has generously offered all Mommy Cracked readers 50 FREE 4x6 prints just for registering and trying it out. Use code 50CRACKED at checkout.